Patience

I want to talk about patience for a minute since it has come up a few times regarding the work I do. Several people lately have told me, surprisingly, how much patience I have to work with people with special needs- whether they are physical or cognitive deficits. First, I want to say that patience is a skill  I  learned over time. As a young person in my 20s I don't think anyone that spent any time with me could say I was patient. Quite the opposite really. However, over time starting with my work in massage therapy, I started to become more compassionate towards people in pain. I know what real pain feels like having scoliosis and feel I could relate to other people in pain. Secondly, by going to school and learning about different diagnoses I came to understand various predicaments of the human condition. I first noticed this aspect of learned patience when I was studying mental health and was in line at the grocery store. Someone was taking an extra long time to get their stuff together. Normally, I would have started to stamper becoming impatient with each passing minute. This time I found myself thinking to myself, what if this person has a mental illness or a brain injury (a condition that is not outwardly visible) and struggles with organization. Thirdly, as I've worked with people I have learned that it really doesn't help any situation to be impatient; it can have the reverse effect by making people stressed out and flustered. Lastly, I will work with someone for 30-75 minutes an then am done. When it comes to a family member or a close friend requiring patience you are with them a lot longer and patience can be a lot more challenging and emotional. When I have a family or friend of a patient say, "you have so much patience!" I remind them not to feel inadequate because it is a very different experience being the therapist.